Mama's Eulogy

I want to first thank everyone present, on behalf of our family, for coming to this celebration of the life of our mother Antonia.  I know that there are some that were unable to come because of distance or other obligations, but have sent their love and sympathy.  We truly appreciate it.

I haven't written anything in almost 3 years.  Mostly because writing takes inspiration.  Today I decided to share with you some insight into the life of my Guardian Angel, our Queen Bee, my mother, Antonia Rivera Martinez.  Not only my life long inspiration but my reason for being.

Some of you know her as the stubborn, willful, determined old lady who laughed and ignored the doctors throughout the years, as her health slowly but surely began to fail.  And that is basically true.  She was stubborn.  She was willful.  She was determined.  But she was also so much more than that.

Her love of children perhaps was forged by her life experience.  Mom was born in Ciales, Puerto Rico, July 16, 1935. By the tender age of 7, she was already an orphan.  Losing her mother Tomasa Martinez to a tubal ligation operation.  But even before then, she was moved around from family member to family member.  Being an out of wedlock child, in the 1930's, brought a lot of negative stigma with it,  compound that with being an orphan, and mom felt the sting of a door closed in her face more than once.  Her father Pablo Rivera was a bachelor, a coffee bean laborer who it seemed was unable to care for her.  God rest his soul.  Finally, her father's sister, Hemenegilda, reluctantly took my mother in. Grandma Hemenegilda was strict, very religious and dominating.  God rest her soul. Not the greatest atmosphere for the free spirited rebellious girl.  Mom couldn't wait to leave home.  So at 15 she went out on her own, the way most girls of that time would, who didn't get married or left to college, by getting pregnant.

Mom found strength from being a mother.  So she had 11 children.  She loved babies.  The way they looked.  The way they smelled.  The way they totally depended on her.  I know her quick thinking and uncanny ability to react quickly saved more than one life in this room.  I know, I owe my life to her.  There were days when she would come home from spending hours in an emergency room with one sick child, to pick up another one of us, usually with asthma, and go right back to the hospital.  I thank God everyday for my sister Aida, because I know she was the main reason Mom was able to pull that off.  She would often say that her greatest and only possession where her children.  Mom also said that she would never leave her "pollitos" even if it meant we would all be under a bridge.  But together we would stay.  And together we did stay.  You could say, that was mama's fight to the end.  To keep us all together.

As we all moved out and had families of our own, I remember countless times when she was awaken in the middle of the night with some emergency.  And with us, there was always something.  She never said no.  It was as if she was designed to be ready for when her family needed her, she awaited the calls and was willing and able to run to any hospital, any family member, or any state to be of help in anyway she could.  Mama lived for her babies, even when her babies stopped being babies decades ago.  She never stopped asking for us.  She never stopped praying for us. She never stopped waiting for that call that told her she was needed.  Even when she couldn't balance on her own two feet, she thought, when the time came she could still run out that door to rescue us, her babies.

In preparing myself to write this, I started remembering little peculiarities about Mama that are uniquely hers.  Like, she redefined the word "something".  For the rest of her life and I just could not figure out why, she would pronounce it "somesing".   Also, if you had a baby picture you just couldn't figure out who it was, take it to Mom.  It didn't matter if the photo was recent or 50 years old, she knew who that baby was.  Oh, and if you were worried about a big debt that you just couldn't afford right now, she would come out with her famous "La ultima la paga el diablo!"  Or another saying, "Un clavo saca a otro".  When we came home with a broken heart.  You also had to be careful when you complimented Mom on something she was wearing, like pretty new shoes or a bracelet or a charm, because she had the tendency of trying to give it to you.  Ever heard the saying "He would give his shirt off his back".  That was mom, in a nut shell.  Mom believed in sharing what little she had and in helping others.  Whether you were family or not, if you ended up on her front door, suddenly, you had a plate of food and a bed to sleep in.  Oh, and the unsolicited, usually spot on advice on how to solve your problems were part of the package.  But don't get me wrong, if she needed to pull your ears because you messed up, she had no problems getting the job done.  Oh but her cooking was so worth the scolding.

Let's remember that Mom is now with our Lord, Jesus Christ.  She is young, she is beautiful, she is healthy.  Mom was well known for her beauty and her temper.  Just imagine her with her loved ones. With her parents and grandparents, with our adorable niece Orlaida, her beloved daughter Lillian and unforgettable son Nano.  I can just see Mom, grabbing random angels and making them sit and listen to her go on and on about her children.  Sometimes divulging embarrasing information along the way.  Her sense of boundaries were sometimes questionable.  But we all know, she meant well.

I am not saying anything most of you don't already know.  Perhaps some of you will have better stories of Mom or times you shared together.  And that is wonderful.  That is what we are here for to celebrate the time the Lord graced us to spend with our Guardian Angel, our Queen Bee.   A woman also known as Mom, Grandma, Great Grandma, Daughter, Sister, Auntie, Cousin, Counselor, Advocate, Good Neighbor-Friend and Father.  These are all the titles that she earned throughout her life.  And the only titles that really meant "somesing" to her.

Thank you.